Noelle

My little piece of heaven on earth.

At Home

It’s quite interesting how we could find calm in the most contradicting manner. I frequent this dump site in Tondo whenever the pangs of this shambolic being tend to get the best of me. It’s a place I feel at home at, despite the enormously desolate milieu that has become the embodiment of the area.


The dump is both a symbol of resiliency and despair. Everywhere you look, people are trying to make a living out of whatever is thrown there. Thousands of residents make a living out of scavenging for recyclables such as plastics and metals. At an area where charcoal is made, workers of all ages sweat it out all day in order to put food on the table at the day’s end. The seemingly eternal stream of smoke is awfully painful even just after five minutes of being engulfed by it. But they are immersed in it for hours and hours on a daily basis.



Despite the cloak of obvious bleakness surrounding the residents, sparks of conviction start to show once you get to talk to the residents. A lot of them have accepted the fact that they have not been blessed with the kind of life that most of us have. But day in and day out they break their bones working for so little instead of resorting to illegal means such as theft or drugs. All the hard work done with the motivating force of having an honest life along with the hopes of having a better tomorrow for them and their children. It may be such an ascending aspiration from their position, but it is something that is truly admirable.


At the end of the day, seeing the workers play a small game of volleyball was such a entrancing sight. For me it was a testament of how the human spirit could carry on despite everything else that is happening. The residents seemed to be happy and content, which made me start to think why I was not. All of a sudden, I found a certain calm by seeing how beautifully simple life could be. I haven’t gone to church for almost a year now because I can’t seem to find God and his goodness within the confides of the pretentious structure. Instead, I see and feel more of him whenever I am at such places which in totality, is a way better, more intimate manifestation of his grace than attending an unnecessary formality.

Foxy Boxing

Lady boxing at a pub in Malate, Manila.

Looking for Peace

A restless soul has the tendency to bring us to disparate places in search of calm. Everybody seems to be in a quest for tranquilty or even just a sense of it nowadays. It’s so hard to believe that it is within us that it can be found.

Après Batifoler

It is an inevitability of life that we meet people who make time worthwhile. Whether it is a day, a week or a minute.. It’s the ramifications we have shared that last us a lifetime.

Remembering Bangkok

Was scanning through the photos I took from my last Bangkok trip and I really had a nostalgic moment just as if I was there yesterday. Anything that has been your first is really hard to forget in my opinion. Especially when you come across stickers such as this no-farting one I saw inside one of the cabs.

Dutdutan '08

Seeing tattoos meticulously done such as this one made me want to get one myself. But I guess I’m too much of a chicken to face the enormous potential of regretting and not being able to change it sometime in the future. Dutdutan was fun, and I saw how a lot of people have this certain love affair with tattoos. It was art for me, and not a means of vandalizing one’s body like what the common notion says. I’ve always been fascinated with tattoos and the thought of having one. I admired the enormous variety on display there, but it’s not for me.

Bad Ads

A few days ago I got an offer to from a big advertising agency here in Manila. They said that they wanted to use some of my photos for the promotion of Cinemanila. I was open to the idea since I believe in Cinemanila’s potential to help out emerging filmmakers develop and share their stories. They sent me the drafts and I was shocked with what they wanted to do. Here are the samples they wanted to do.







I felt totally appalled the moment I saw their proposal. Why? They utterly took the subjects and their situations out of context. It definitely did not give justice to the realities that the photographs carried. Their plight is not material for any poster or any marketing schemes. I was very offended, not just as a photographer but also as somebody who was there to interact with them. I saw how heartless and insensitive the world of advertising could be.

I took these photographs and posted them on my pages because they elicited strong emotions which drew me to take it. Not because I wanted to make money out of it; not because I wanted to win awards nor for it to be a testament to my skills as a photographer. Hell no. But because these images called me and struck a certain sentiment. And that’s what I hope I could share.

Making money is a rational inevitability in today’s world. Especially in photography. I could just imagine how I would be so flattered to get an offer like this and an opportunity to get published if I was still in the stages of being naive as a young and starting photographer. We should not be swayed with such things even if the pay is tempting. In my opinion as somebody who is still very much starting out, this practice of documentary and photojournalism should have the subjects be the champions of our work. It shouldn’t be about the egos, the claim to fame, awards or anything else. Not even the by-line. Content should be given supreme importance. One can call me being such an idealist, but hey - there’s no price on being able to sleep with a clear conscience at the end of the day.

At Play

Another slow day and I was tasked to look for stand-alones. Driving all the way to the coastal areas of Cavite seem to have a calming effect on me. Talking to the people who work in the wet market by the shoreline; connecting with the consideable amount of Ilonggos who have made their way there for hopes of a better life than the province; hearing their stories and sharing laughs; sampling the fantastic kinilaw (though their freshness can seriously be doubted since it was caught off polluted waters) by one of the karinderias there or just the usual adobo.. It’s a very homey feeling. I saw these kids playing with their makeshift rafts, and it has been a common sight ever since before I was born. I love going to Cavite since I never felt that I was working. Instead, I was always at play.

Running to Stand Still

I came to Bangkok with a full-blown coup stamped inside my mind. My penchant of being in a conflict situation, even as minute of a scale as this one, pushed me to get out of my shell and pursue it. I finally gave in to my urge of going out of my country with the hopes of experiencing something different from the wonted routines I had in Manila. So I finally decided to embark on my first trip to a foreign country by myself.

The first nights brought me to a high of how Thais do their protests. Everything was new to me. They were well-organized; free food and water for everybody. They virtually made the government house their home. Everybody bathed and slept there. The Thais were amazingly warm to the media. Not just the PAD but even the everyday Thai you would meet on the streets. The feeling of being there to witness and be part of something big in their history was something that was assimilated within me at first. Yes, they have done this a million times before, but it was their first time to be able to occupy the government house which was a reason why a lot of people invested to cover the volatile situation.



Camping out night after night at the government palace were followed by dyspeptic feelings of disappointment as every night went quiet. My initial presumptions of riots and unrest as a diurnal occasion in Bangkok disappeared with each quiet night that passed by. So I decided to shoot daily life inside the grounds instead. On my fifth day of traipsing around the camp until dawn, the waiting game struck me as one that is already futile. I finally acknowledged the fact that I went here with such audacity only to find myself not getting what I came for.



The painful realization of falling flat on my face and not getting what I expected drove me back to a day of solitude inside my hotel, enervated like never before. Everything from the expenses to the hasty decision started to rattle my head and began to sprung out emotions such as regret and even foolishness. It seemed as if all the lines were lost and everything was all drawn out. I found myself asking the same question that drove me to fly all the way here.. The same question I was hoping to quench with an answer -

What now?

From the clouding frustration, a clearer mindset was born. The acceptance that this event was not meant for me. I missed the whole thing by a day during my previous trip; ditched Phuket; compromised one or two things back home only to find out that it would never be the way I hoped it to be. It was humbling, but at the end of the day it was just a matter of detachment. There were other things to do in Bangkok rather than just wilt myself hoping to shoot any ruckus that might happen. So many stories, so many interesting things to photograph. But instead of picking up my camera and shoot everything and anything I could, I decided to switch off.

I went out to explore Bangkok not as a photographer firsthand, but as somebody who was having his first taste of life outside his country independently. I went to all the places I wanted to and was curious about, not with photographs in mind. I ate all the curry, pad thai and tom yam that I could; drank all the nai cha; met so many random people from different races and cultures at Khao San and Sukhumvit; finally went to the floating market and rode a freakin’ elephant at last. Yeah, all the things a tourist would do. And it was fun.

I realized that when one is traveling alone, one is not really traveling alone. You are accompanied by all your thoughts, dreams , fears, frustrations, fascinations - a magnitude of emotions which make their presence adamantly pronounced when you find yourself alone in unfamiliar territory. Photographically, I don’t think I achieved anything. But this certainly was a huge stepping stone for me in terms of traveling. It definitely opened my eyes, my mind and my heart to how life could be outside the confides of my own country. I may have jeopardized one or two things to make this trip, but getting in touch with one’s self is priceless. No regrets at all.

Roundtrip

Back in Bangkok, seeing what’s in store for me. It’s trippy as usual, even the demonstrations.

Something Fishy

I love shooting in wet markets. Besides smelling like fish and slaughtered meat afterwards, interesting photos and people are just there waiting to be stumbled upon.

Bangkok Trippin

Bangkok was such a trippy place to be in. Saw so many interesting and unusual places fresh to my existence. It’s funny how going to other places stimulate an insatiable desire to traverse and wander throughout this world that we live it. Three short days weren’t enough to digest the new experience. And the thing was I missed the big protests, currently going on there right now by just one day, and it could’ve been a really good opportunity. It sucks like a bitch but that’s how life goes.

Do or Don't

Photographing people in desolate situations could invoke a diverging emotion within one’s self. I took this photo of Gael, 10 years of age, as I was looking for a photo of daily life for work. He was scavenging the polluted shores of Manila Bay for plastic recyclables to be sold. I was really disheartened as I followed him wading through all the garbage on his bare feet. A child this young should be studying; or even just be playing instead of risking his health and safety to earn cash.

Yes, a lot told me that it was a nice photo. But it should be more than that. Taking photos of people in such conditions and showing it to the world could sound very cold; heartless even. But personally I felt that these realities, coated with all the harshness, should be seen. A lot would argue with me on this one but at the end of the day it all boils down to the subject. I never took this with a prize or acclaim in mind. I took this because it evoked certain feelings and realizations of how unforgiving life is for a lot of people. And that I intend to share.

It is a constant dissenting stand that photographers around the world face in my own opinion. Photographers are the eyes of a lot of people whether it is life’s most beautiful moments, down to the worst things mankind could ever see. I do believe that these images are to be shared, not just as a pretty photograph, but with the essence of the subjects that come along with it.

Roam Magazine

Roam’s premier issue is out now. It’s my first time to contribute to a magazine and I never thought it would be such a delightful feeling to see your work published in one. Get your copies now, you’ll love it!

Feature Picture

Getting assigned to do features and have the freedom to show the world what caught your attention is one of the best things I love doing for the wires. Slow days like today allows me to explore a the city I live in and the intriguing daily life scenes that come along with it.

Dimsum and Doggies

It was my day off, and my parents were home since it’s a holiday. I just got last month’s paycheck and decided to treat them out to lunch at this fantastic dimsum place in Chinatown, a new discovery for me courtesy of Derek. I never had fresher, tastier dimsum in my life.

We basically wanted to try everything on the menu, so we did. Everything was made right in front of you and everything we had was fantastic. Pork, vegetable, mixed dimsums; fried, steamed, with soup and noodles; even the seafood omelet. We were stuffed, and it just cost me a little over a thousand pesos to take my parents out to a good meal. Quality time with them nowadays has been hard to come by, and sharing good food with them really hit the spot.



We went around the area and it was interesting to find out that my parents had their dates there. They were so nostalgic, and made me start to realize that time really can just pass by like a breeze. Everything could happen so fast, without us realizing it. I know I am in my last few years living with my folks; some even move out years before my age now. So I really want the most out of it, even just by having an afternoon like this every once in a while.



I was in a spoiling mood and I thought of buying my dog Bono a few pieces of steak to make up for lost time. I always have the tendency not to spend time with him because of work. He grew up so fast, without me noticing it - badly needs grooming too. Being too enthralled with work can really take you away from a lot of things.

Painting With Coffee

Today’s assignment was very much more interesting than the usual. Went to Marikina with TV to do a feature on Filipino artist Sunshine Plata who uses coffee for her artworks. Plata, 28, produces different shades of brown by mixing varying quantities of instant coffee with water. Her works have been exhibited locally here in Manila and even sponsored by coffee giants such as Nescafe. Her artworks have gone as far as being exhibited all the way in the Ripley’s museum in New York and was even featured in the Martha Stewart show. Her works currently sells for $895-$1791.



But the road towards her success is one that was not paved smoothly. Sunshine always wanted to take up a fine arts at her Alma Matter of the University of Santo Tomas. But instead, she, in her own words, halfheartedly took up Psychology and became a preschool teacher for five years. She eventually gave it up to concentrate her life for the one thing that she truly loved - painting. I admired her for living her dream. Quite suitingly, she gets all the ideas for her artworks from her dreams. All the images she paints come from images she sees and remembers whenever she sleeps.


Sunshine admitted that she didn’t have the access to expensive materials that the typical artists use when she started. A trip to the Ripley’s musem was where the idea of using coffee as paint sprung when she saw an exhibited 19th century artifact with a signature that was written using coffee and thought that if a coffee signature could be preserved for a long time, what more for a painting? Apart from painting full time, she advocates the promotion of using coffee for artworks by giving out workshops from time to time.

Romanticizing Poverty

People often ask me the question “why poverty?” It’s usually followed-up with “can’t you go shoot something else?” It can get pretty annoying. But yes, all the queries led me to think why I am so lured by this unremitting issue that is so strongly considered something already timeworn. Why do I risk my own safety and on certain occasions, my life even day in and day out just on exploring a myriad of slums for something people think is overworked? Cliche even.

To start off, I don’t think I ever had a proper acquaintance with poverty. As I grew up, the superlative notion of poverty for me were the beggars panhandling for money while you are inside your car. Yes, I was that superficial. As I became a photojournalist, I slowly started to see on my own what poverty was and the actualities that come along with it. I was shocked to see people hoard trash for a living; to see people actually living and having communities under bridges; people setting up floating shanties along the shorelines because they didn’t have any land to squat anymore.



Seeing all these things and knowing that they exist made me open my eyes that my world is not just about school, home and getting wasted. There were so much more going on, even just in Manila. I know well that poverty is not the only issue that the world should be concerned about, and a lot of people think that I am building my works just on that issue. On the contrary, it was stepping stone to further my inquisition and thirst for experiences and knowledge about the environment I live in.



Sadness is something is the feeling that is usually evoked when it comes to this subject. I always did feel awful, but at the same time it has been my experiences with people dealing with the situation’s harsh realities that I have experienced and felt the true beauty of us as humans. I never have thought that unbelievable resiliency, compassion and kindness could be seen even in the darkest corners of life here in Manila. Somehow I’ve always felt at home and and at a distinct sense of calm whenever I am in these places.

Poverty is dear to me since it has renewed me as a person more than anything. It has inspired me and has grounded; along with its realities that have to be accepted. Yes, a lot of people would say that it’s the most overused of subjects photographically but it is a personal thing for me. I have been naive and shallow before all of this and I am just beginning to see all of this just now. Romanticizing poverty, I must admit. Because it does matter to me.

Downtime

Me and Luis on a very busy day